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8 lesser-known orientations along the sexuality spectrum
Sexuality is fluid and it's important that people get to define it for themselves.
25 April, 2020
- Sexuality is fluid and ever-changing, and our understanding of it has come a long way since the invention of the Kinsey Scale in the 1940's.
- Defining your own sexuality is important as it is a uniquely personal experience.
- While creating labels for yourself can help you better understand your orientation and build connections along your sexual journey, it's important not to place labels on others. Be open to hearing how they see themselves and respectful enough to refer to them on those terms.
<p>Sexuality can be a big part of your identity. It can encompass nearly every aspect of your being, including your actions, your attitude, your behaviors, and your feelings. It can impact the way you experience sexual attraction (if you do) and it can alter your preferences around sexual and romantic relationships. </p><p><strong>Why is sexuality thought of as a spectrum? </strong></p><p>A spectrum, in this context, is a tool that can help us better understand the fluidity of sexuality, among other things. The <a href="https://kinseyinstitute.org/research/publications/kinsey-scale.php" target="_blank">Kinsey Scale</a>, perhaps one of the most well-known spectrum scales, was created in 1948 by Alfred Kinsey, founder of the Kinsey Institute. </p><p>The scale allows people at "zero" to report as exclusively heterosexual, and people at the opposite end (six) to report as exclusively homosexual - with ratings 1-5 being people who report varying levels of attraction or sexual activity with either sex. There is also a "category X" designated for those who report no sexual reactions or relations. </p><p>This scale was the first of it's kind and it challenged the perceptions of sexuality and really, was a starting point for where we are today. </p><p><strong>Modern-day sexuality and labels...</strong></p><p>Over time, we have learned more and more about the sexuality spectrum and it's become more and more normalized to place yourself really anywhere along the spectrum. It's safe to say we have come a very long way since the 1940s when the Kinsey Scale was first created. </p><p>Sexuality is fluid, it is ever-changing and extremely personal - defining your own sexuality is what's important, not placing these labels on others for them. It's also extremely normal to be overwhelmed by all the different words we now have to describe various sexual and romantic orientations, attractions, and behaviors. </p><p>Along with the ever-growing spectrum, it's our responsibility as human beings to adapt and expand the language we use to describe our own (and other people's) sexual preferences. While these "labels" can help us better understand ourselves, they are by no means set in stone.</p><ul class="ee-ul"></ul>
Defining lesser-known orientations along the spectrum
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMzE2OTIwOS9vcmlnaW4ucG5nIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYwNTYxNzk5Mn0.NF95JhhXPcLdT5k6fMP54AQYvFdZiPK3aVQ90Wa9g0o/img.png?width=980" id="bfd51" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="5d68bd6890a288fd97a3fb5e6724c78d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Unofficial Kinsey Scale test (an official test does not exist, according to the Kinsey Institute)
<p><em>"Many persons do not want to believe that there are gradations in these matters from one to the other extreme."</em> - <a href="https://kinseyinstitute.org/research/publications/kinsey-scale.php" target="_blank">Sexual Behavior of the Human Female</a>, 1953.</p><p>It's safe (and wonderful) to say that we have come a long way since the 1950's. Sexuality and sexual orientation have become more widely talked about, accepted, and even respected. There are still many areas of the world where people are punished for simply existing as who they are and loving who they love, but the best thing we can do as a society is to adapt and evolve with the spectrum. </p><p>In the spirit of adapting and growing, here is a breakdown of some lesser-known orientations along the sexuality spectrum. </p><p><strong>Autosexual and/or Autoromantic</strong> </p><p>Autosexuality is the idea of being sexually attracted to yourself. Autoromantic describes the notion of being in a romantic relationship with yourself. </p><p>Autosexuality can mean being turned on by your own look, being excited to spend time alone rather than with a significant other, and/or masturbating to the idea of yourself.</p><p>Dr. Jess O'Reilly, a sex and relationship expert, suggests that we may all be <a href="https://globalnews.ca/news/5022369/what-is-autosexuality/" target="_blank">"a shade of autosexual,"</a> with some people using it to define themselves and others shying away from it due to body shaming. </p><p>While autosexuality is often used synonymously with narcissism, Dr. O'Reilly believes otherwise: "[The core erotic feeling] is a feeling you require to even consider having sex, and for many of us, our core erotic feeling involves feeling sexy and feeling desired. You might have an outside source who conveys that desire or it may even be within yourself." </p><p>Dr. O'Reilly <a href="https://globalnews.ca/news/5022369/what-is-autosexuality/" target="_blank">goes on to question</a>: "Can't we give ourselves permission to feel arousal in response to our own body?" </p><p><strong>Demisexual (compared to Graysexual and Asexual)</strong></p><p>To be <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/demisexual#asexual-allosexual-spectrum" target="_blank">demisexual</a> is to experience sexual attraction in very specific situations, most often with people you have an emotional connection with. </p><p>Someone who identifies as demisexual can typically only experience and thrive in sexual attraction once an emotional bond has been formed. That bond doesn't necessarily have to be explained as love or romance, but it can be friendship (even a platonic friendship) that allows them to feel a sexual or romantic attraction. </p><p>While many people <em>choose </em>to only have sexual relations with people we feel connected to, demisexual people aren't making that choice, but rather, they <em>need </em>that bond to even begin to feel sexually attracted to someone. </p><p>And yet, having an emotional bond with someone doesn't mean people who identify as demisexual will develop a sexual attraction to that person—just as heterosexual men are attracted to women but may not find every single woman they meet to be attractive. </p><p><a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/demisexual#demisexual-vs-graysexual" target="_blank">Graysexual</a>, on the other hand, is often considered as the "gray area" between asexual (a term used to describe not having any sexual attraction to others) and allosexual (the opposite of asexual; also called sexual). </p><p>People who identify as graysexual don't explicitly or exclusively identify with being asexual or allosexual. They do experience sexual attraction or desire on some level but perhaps not the same intensity as people on either end of the asexual-allosexual line. </p><p><strong>Pansexual, Pomosexual and Spectrasexual</strong></p><p>Pansexual is a term that describes individuals who experience sexual, romantic, and/or emotional attraction to any person regardless of that person's gender, sex, or sexual orientation. </p><p>Pomosexual is more of a term than an identity. It's used to describe individuals who reject sexuality labels or who simply don't identify with any one of them. </p><p>Spectrasexuality is a term used to describe people who are able to feel romantic or physical attraction/emotional connections with people of multiple or various sexual orientations and genders, but not necessarily all of them (or any of them). </p><p>These terms are often used interchangeably, but it's important to point out the differences. Pansexual is by far the most commonly used word of the bunch and is more geared towards not seeing the label and seeing the person instead, thus being able to build romantic and sexual relationships with anyone, regardless of their orientation. </p><p>People who identify as spectrasexual, on the other hand, are able to be attracted to multiple or various genders or sexual orientations, but still may have certain preferences.</p>
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What is the ultimate goal of 'Project Blitz', the Christian nationalist movement?
The separation of church and state is being dismantled one bill at a time.
26 February, 2020
Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
- Project Blitz, a coalition of Christian right groups founded by former Republican congressman, Randy Forbes, began as a way to introduce pro-Christian legislation.
- Bills include faith-based adoption discrimination and mandating that public schools use "In God We Trust" on signage.
- This year, 226 pieces of anti-transgender legislation, many backed by The Blitz, have been introduced.
<p>In 1861, Reverend M.R. Watkinson pleaded with U.S. Secretary of the Treasure, Salmon Chase, to mint American money with the term, "In God We Trust." The Pennsylvania minister believed that America's separation of church and state was a disgrace. Three years later, all two-cent bronze pieces bore the slogan; other coins soon followed.</p><p>Ninety years later, President Eisenhower and Vice President Nixon helped add "under God" to Francis Bellamy's 1892 secular tribute, the Pledge of Allegiance. Congress officially adopted the pledge in 1942. A dozen years later, on Flag Day, the accolade to a higher power was added. That same year the phrase, "In God We Trust," was first printed on U.S. postage stamps. In 1955 the term was added to paper money; a year later it became the nation's first official motto. </p><p>Although the First Amendment calls for the separation of church and state, the Eisenhower administration pushed hard to ensure that God was at the forefront of government transmissions. While every clause of the First Amendment has been challenged in some capacity, nothing has created as much longstanding tension and debate as religion. To this day, many Americans believe that we live in a Christian nation—that such a reality should be as obvious as Judaism in Israel. </p><p>One of the latest groups to push this agenda is Project Blitz, a coalition of Christian right groups founded by former Republican congressman, Randy Forbes. The Virginia representative served from 2001-17 in the state's 4<sup>th</sup> congressional district, having spent the previous term in the Virginia Senate. He's also served as Chairman of the Republican Party of Virginia and founded the Congressional Prayer Caucus Foundation (CPCF), a group that <a href="https://www.politicalresearch.org/2019/11/07/project-blitz-any-other-name" target="_blank">claims</a> to have a network of 950 state legislators in 38 states. </p>
<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6ac2f6ddb953849063fe043ae6ba5ecc"><iframe type="lazy-iframe" data-runner-src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/JBtd7D2uilk?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>Project Blitz is, first and foremost, political. The group specifically creates legislation that, <a href="https://www.au.org/church-state/february-2019-church-state-magazine/viewpoint/battling-the-blitz-the-religious-rights" target="_blank">according</a> to Mr. Forbes, "protect the free exercise of traditional Judeo-Christian religious values and beliefs in the public square, and to reclaim and properly define the narrative which supports such beliefs."</p><p>In 2018, 70 Blitz-backed bills were considered in state legislatures; 25 were introduced. These bills include <a href="https://www.christianpost.com/news/in-god-we-trust-religious-freedom-laws-advance-states-christians-project-blitz.html" target="_blank">refusing adoption</a> to adults based on faith and <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/26/opinion/project-blitz-christian-nationalists.html?login=email&auth=login-email" target="_blank">mandating</a> that public schools include "In God We Trust" on signage, as well as <a href="http://archive.is/FrFH6" target="_blank">teach from</a> the Bible. There are also <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/jun/04/project-blitz-the-legislative-assault-by-christian-nationalists-to-reshape-america" target="_blank">anti-LGBT measures</a> on tap—<a href="https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2020/02/226-bills-target-lgbtq-americans-year-one-organization-behind-lot/" target="_blank">226 this year alone</a>. One <a href="https://static1.squarespace.com/static/5bd8728e7eb88c68a5c8509f/t/5c11f4cd6d2a7305cb6877eb/1544680663671/Project+Blitz+Fact+Sheet.pdf" target="_blank">tactic favored</a> by the Blitz is to brand opponents of their legislation as being against the freedom of religion. </p><p>On its website, CPCF has a series of <a href="https://cpcfoundation.com/faith-impact-guide/" target="_blank">toolkits</a> that offer guidance to help "advance a God-honoring culture in our communities and nation." The goal is to identify the political landscapes of states by pinpointing "anti-faith" and "pro-faith" groups in various districts. The Blitz can then focus on districts susceptible to its agenda. </p><p>Frederick Carlson works as a senior research analyst at a think tank that studies right-leaning political groups. He <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/jun/04/project-blitz-the-legislative-assault-by-christian-nationalists-to-reshape-america" target="_blank">expresses consternation</a> over the fact that a political organization brazenly announces its intentions in plain sight, referencing the founding document of CPCF. </p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"It's very rare that you come across a major primary source document that changes the way you view everything, and this is one of those times. This is a 116-page strategy manual hidden away on a website explaining at least what a section of the religious right are doing in the United States. To me that's astounding."</p>
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjc5NzA1Mi9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzODQ2NzM2N30.OMNwVFwzqDPcplr4qZLIr7x2h-YesgEUsCqifGcZP30/img.jpg?width=1245&coordinates=0%2C70%2C0%2C30&height=700" id="c014d" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="0f2662c80ea5572e78ecf05d45d41844" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="Rep. Steve King and Rep. Randy Forbes" />
Rep. Steve King, R-Iowa, left, and Rep. Randy Forbes, R-Va., talk before the start of the House Judiciary Committee hearing on "Oversight of the United States Department of Homeland Security" on Thursday, May 29, 2014.
Photo By Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call
<p>The Blitz's signature tactic, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBtd7D2uilk" target="_blank">according to</a> Rachel Laser, the president of Americans United for the Separation of Church and State, is to start small with signage in public places. Ascending levels of religiosity follow, such as denying homosexual couples the same rights as heterosexuals. The ultimate goal, she says, is to codify Christian principles into the American government. </p><p>The First Amendment, Laser continues, does not allow you to play favorites. You cannot favor the agendas of a particular religion over others. That goes directly against the separation of church and state. </p><p>The Blitz has no intention of slowing down. The current administration appears particularly willing to cater to bills being pushed forward by CPCF and related organizations. For example, <a href="https://friendlyatheist.patheos.com/2020/02/21/iowa-legislators-are-considering-nine-bills-promoting-christian-nationalism/" target="_blank">right now</a> there are nine Blitz-backed bills being considered in Iowa. These include putting mottos like "In God We Trust" and "endowed by their Creator" in every public school throughout the state. Meanwhile, Blitz-backed anti-transgender proposals <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2020/02/25/new-kind-anti-trans-legislation-is-hitting-red-states/" target="_blank">were or are being</a> introduced in ten states. </p><p>Project Blitz is part of a very long game: to so familiarize the American public with debates over signage that we fail to recognize that the goalposts are constantly being moved. As Princeton history professor, Kevin Kruse, writes in his book, "One Nation Under God," "touchstones of religious nationalism have only become more deeply lodged in American political culture over time, as the innovations of one generation became familiar traditions for the next." What is first presented as innocuous, commonsense even, can soon transform a nation. The gap implied by "separation" is closed by inches, not miles. </p><p>--</p><p><em>Stay in touch with Derek on <a href="http://www.twitter.com/derekberes" target="_blank">Twitter</a> and <a href="https://www.facebook.com/DerekBeresdotcom" target="_blank">Facebook</a>. His next book is "</em><em>Hero's Dose: The Case For Psychedelics in Ritual and Therapy."</em></p>
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30% of Americans believe it's okay for businesses not to serve gay folks
Discrimination is up across the board.
01 July, 2019
Photo credit: Joe Amon / The Denver Post via Getty Images
- A new poll by PPRI found that nearly a quarter of Americans say it's okay to not serve atheists on religious grounds.
- The pro-discrimination number was even higher regarding gays and lesbians.
- Bias against Jews, Muslims, and African Americans is also increasing.
<p>Discrimination has long been an ugly human trait. Bias served an important role over the long course of evolution — "Is this friend or foe approaching?" — but this social and biological construct has largely failed us over the last few centuries. </p><p>In an age of instantaneous global connectivity the case for diversity is stark, yet the chains of the past still bind us.</p><p>That's the consensus of a <a href="https://www.prri.org/research/increasing-support-for-religiously-based-service-refusals/" target="_blank">new poll</a>, at least, by the Public Religion Research Institute (PPRI), a nonprofit, nonpartisan research and education organization that specializes in identifying trends in religious life and belief. This wide-ranging survey discovered that bias against atheists and the LBGT community still runs high; on the flip side, negative feelings toward the religious remains problematic, with more atheists believing it kosher to discriminate against the faithful. </p><p>The survey centers on a single question: Is it okay to refuse business to a person of [race/belief]? This updated poll (the last was in 2014) follows an <a href="https://www.cnn.com/2018/06/04/politics/masterpiece-colorado-gay-marriage-cake-supreme-court/index.html" target="_blank">infamous case</a> of a Colorado baker that went all the way to the Supreme Court, which ruled in his favor: yes, on religious grounds someone gay can be refused service. The baker is now being sued for a <a href="https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-masterpiece-cakeshop-baker-jack-phillips-sued-anti-lgbtq-trans-20190612-l7pavnk4djhxlmx4or3aqcvibq-story.html" target="_blank">third time</a>, the latest due to his refusal for creating a gender transition cake. </p><p>Transgenders are also included in the PPRI survey, along with gays and lesbians, atheists, Jews, Muslims, and African Americans, representing a broad swath of groups to discriminate against — belief, ethnicity, race, and sexual orientation all on the table. </p><p>While this might seem a hodgepodge of groups to clump together, the broad topic of "service refusal" offers disturbing (yet also somewhat hopeful) clues into how the human mind invents and then swears by categorization. The survey was conducted by randomly interviewing 1,100 American adults over the age of 18 in April, 2019. Texas is oversampled in this poll, with 150 respondents living in that state. </p><p>The good news is that the majority of Americans do not feel it right to discriminate on any grounds. Yet the trend lines reveal a more troubling narrative: in every group, more Americans feel it justified to refuse service in 2019 than just five years earlier. </p>
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8xOTYzMzA2OC9vcmlnaW4ucG5nIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxNzgwMDUwNn0.g4QJtAjQIiy7jXStRYWQPu0U5EMqSEniOzgPJH9eKck/img.png?width=980" id="f869e" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="17012cedcb3ae5fe9569baadbbe223f0" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" /><p><strong>Atheists</strong></p><p>While there is a growing number of atheists, "nones," and <a href="https://bigthink.com/21st-century-spirituality/religious-liminal-population-accounts-for-a-fifth-of-humans" target="_self">liminals</a> in America, nearly a quarter of respondents (24 percent) claim that it's okay for business owners to refuse to serve atheists. Though the focus should be on the 72 percent of Americans that disagree, there is one disturbing trend: the nays are up nearly 10 percent since 2014, when only 15 percent of respondents felt the same. Religious backlash or oversampled Texas? Difficult to gauge. </p><p>Republicans remained the most anti-atheist group, with 37 percent giving a thumbs up to discriminating against nonbelievers. Independents came in at 21 percent and Democrats at 17 percent. The big shift is in Republicanism, as only 19 percent felt the same in 2014.</p>
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8xOTYzMzA3MS9vcmlnaW4ucG5nIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxODg2MjM4Mn0.9UGdF5VvTyUxp8uDTvLAoRdt6Tqhg1JIJzdObY_7VHY/img.png?width=980" id="1671d" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="11e03a5742d06eb3d00fca7e0c9e5234" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" /><p><strong>Gays and Lesbians</strong></p><p>While every group feels discriminated against in some capacity in a time when everyone has a platform to argue such, over the last decade gays and lesbians have led the charge in fighting back against a history of persecution, jailing, and murder. Still, nearly a third of Americans (30 percent) believe it is fine for business owners to not serve them. </p><p>While Republicans are leading the polls (47 percent versus 21 percent in 2014), Independents and Democrats are also more biased today than just a half-decade ago, pushing the overall number up from 16 percent to 30 percent. </p><p><strong>Transgender People</strong></p><p>There was no poll for transgender people in 2014, showing just how quickly this topic has arisen in popular American consciousness. The numbers discriminating against the transgendered is comparable to gays and lesbians, with 29 percent of Americans giving a thumbs up to discriminatory behavior. Men were more biased in this regard (34 percent versus 24 percent of women), with Republicans landing at 44 percent, Independents at 25 percent, and Democrats at 19 percent.</p>
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8xOTY0MTk0OS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjIxNzY2N30.0ZHT1X6RdhfGC2ScIR84rmaSi5_GdvvS9Cr7cKhViNs/img.jpg?width=980" id="55c6a" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="9ecaea715e9a59a4149e13bc1c1411d8" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />
Image source: Education Images / Universal Images Group via Getty Images
<p><strong>Jews</strong></p><p>Antisemitism is a growing concern in our world. While it has always been a problem (as thousands of years of texts describe), you'd think we would have learned the lesson we needed eighty years ago. Not the case. </p><p>Discriminating against Jews is up seven percent since 2014, landing at 19 percent this year. The charge is once again led by Republicans at 24 percent, followed by Democrats at 17 percent. Independents clocked in one point behind Democrats. </p><p><strong>Muslims</strong></p><p>Muslims were also not included in the 2014 poll. In 2019, they were slightly less biased against than atheists, slightly more than Jews, landing at 22 percent. As with every other category in this poll, men were more likely to favor discrimination than women (25 versus 20 percent), while 32 percent of Republicans, 20 percent of Independents, and 14 percent of Democrats are in favor of not serving them if the business owner felt that okay. </p><p><strong>African Americans</strong></p><p>Of all the groups polled, it might bring a certain sense of comfort that African Americans were the least discriminated against group, as this is the only category based purely on race. That said, like the other trend lines, we have a lot of work to do. Favor of discriminating against blacks rose 50 percent, from 10 percent to 15 percent in 2019. The biggest leap in bias occurred amongst white evangelical Protestants, up from 8 percent in 2014 to 22 percent this year. </p><p>--</p><p><em>Stay in touch with Derek on <a href="http://www.twitter.com/derekberes" target="_blank">Twitter</a> and <a href="https://www.facebook.com/DerekBeresdotcom" target="_blank">Facebook</a>.</em></p>
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Coming out trans: How social narratives can stop us from being happy
Many of us don't fit perfectly into existing social narratives. But we can still find our own way.
27 May, 2019
- Many of us are trying to fit into existing roles that aren't specially crafted for us, and, as a result, we don't fit perfectly in them. This causes us a lot of stress and anxiety.
- Though many people aren't transgender, they can still relate to the feeling of not completely fitting in, and having to figure out their own path. Often finding our own way directly overlaps with figuring out what makes us happy.
- When someone is trans, it is possible for them to feel attracted to either gender. For example, Breanna wishes she could tell her teenage self that it is possible to "be a girl and like girls."
- As a stand-up comedian, Pete Holmes knows how words can manipulate audiences — for good and bad.
- Words aren't just words. They stitch together our social fabric, helping establish and maintain relationships.
- Holmes has a clever linguistic exercise meant to bring you closer to the people around you.
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