Why large groups of people often come to the same conclusions
Study confirms the existence of a special kind of groupthink in large groups.
14 January, 2021
Credit: Kaleb Nimz/Unsplash
- Large groups of people everywhere tend to come to the same conclusions.
- In small groups, there's a much wider diversity of ideas.
- The mechanics of a large group make some ideas practically inevitable.
<p>People make sense of the world by organizing things into categories and naming them. "These are circles." "That's a tree." "Those are rocks." It's one way we tame our world. There's a weird correspondence between different cultures, though — even though we come from different places and very different circumstances, cultures everywhere develop largely the same categorizations.</p><p>"But this raises a big scientific puzzle," <a href="https://www.asc.upenn.edu/news-events/news/why-independent-cultures-think-alike-its-not-in-the-brain" target="_blank">says Damon Centola</a> of the University of Pennsylvania. "If people are so different, why do anthropologists find the same categories, for instance for shapes, colors, and emotions, arising independently in many different cultures? Where do these categories come from and why is there so much similarity across independent populations?"</p><p>Centola is the senior investigator of a new study in the journal <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-020-20037-y?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+ncomms%2Frss%2Fcurrent+%28Nature+Communications+-+current%29" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Nature Communications</a> from the Network Dynamics Group (NDG) at the Annenberg School for Communication that explores how such categorization happens.</p><p>Some have theorized that these categories are innate—pre-wired in our brains—but the study says "nope." Its authors hypothesize that it has more to do with the dynamics of large groups, or networks.</p>
The grouping game
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1NDE2Ni9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxMjI2MzA4OX0.RLrswIWbuEzHNqsw0F7EUrp9jPn7OulLPqCxcZT11ik/img.jpg?width=980" id="159b8" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="0feb15d2d7dde144c710c2f4f1e5350c" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="2767" data-height="382" />Some of the shapes used in the experiment
Credit: Guilbeault, et al./University of Pennsylvania
<p>The researchers tested their theory with 1,480 people playing an online "Grouping Game" via Amazon's Mechanical Turk platform. The individuals were paired with another participant or made a member of a group of 6, 8, 24, or 50 people. Each pair and group were tasked with categorizing the symbols shown above, and they could see each other's answers.</p><p>The small groups came up with wildly divergent categories—the entire experiment produced nearly 5,000 category suggestions—while the larger groups came up with categorization systems that were virtually identical to each other.</p><p><a href="https://www.asc.upenn.edu/news-events/news/why-independent-cultures-think-alike-its-not-in-the-brain" target="_blank">Says Centola</a>, "Even though we predicted it, I was nevertheless stunned to see it really happen. This result challenges many long-held ideas about culture and how it forms."</p><p>Nor was this unanimity a matter of having teamed-up like-minded individuals. "If I assign an individual to a small group," says lead author Douglas Guilbeault, "they are much more likely to arrive at a category system that is very idiosyncratic and specific to them. But if I assign that same individual to a large group, I can predict the category system that they will end up creating, regardless of whatever unique viewpoint that person happens to bring to the table."</p>Why this happens
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1NDE4NC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyMjkzMDg0Nn0.u2hdEIgNw4drFZ2frzx0AJ_MAxIizuM98rdovQrIblk/img.jpg?width=980" id="d3444" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="5da57d66e388fad0f1c17afb09af90a7" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="1440" data-height="822" />The many categories suggested by small groups on the left, the few from large groups on the right
Credit: Guilbeault, et al./Nature Communications
<p>The striking results of the experiment correspond to a <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41562-019-0607-5" target="_blank">previous study</a> done by NDG that investigated tipping points for people's behavior in networks.</p><p>That study concluded that after an idea enters a discussion among a large network of people, it can gain irresistible traction by popping up again and again in enough individuals' conversations. In networks of 50 people or more, such ideas eventually reach critical mass and become a prevailing opinion.</p><p>The same phenomenon does not happen often enough within a smaller network, where fewer interactions offer an idea less of an opportunity to take hold.</p>Beyond categories
<p>The study's finding raises an interesting practical possibility: Would categorization-related decisions made by large groups be less likely to fall prey to members' individual biases?</p><p>With this question in mind, the researchers are currently looking into content moderation on Facebook and Twitter. They're investigating whether the platforms would be wiser when categorizing content as free speech or hate speech if large groups were making these decisions instead of lone individuals working at these companies.</p><p>Similarly, they're also exploring the possibility that larger networks of doctors and healthcare professionals might be better at making diagnoses that would avoid biases such as racism or sexism that could cloud the judgment of individual practitioners.</p><p>"Many of the worst social problems reappear in every culture," notes Centola, "which leads some to believe these problems are intrinsic to the human condition. Our research shows that these problems are intrinsic to the social experiences humans have, not necessarily to humans themselves. If we can alter that social experience, we can change the way people organize things, and address some of the world's greatest problems."</p>
Keep reading
Show less
Study: These personality traits predict early career success
A new study found that personality growth in young adults predicted career benefits such as income, degree attainment, and job satisfaction.
08 December, 2020
Credit: fizkes / Adobe Stock
<ul class="ee-ul"></ul>
<p class=""><br></p>
<p>What propels some young adults to successful careers and life satisfaction while others seem destined to perpetual struggle? Social science has long recognized <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1745-6916.2007.00047.x" target="_blank">the role socioeconomic status and cognitive abilities</a> play in success, and we've developed necessary interventions to improve young people's odds. Social programs help struggling families climb a rung or two up the economic ladder, and compulsory education aims to sharpen children's cognitive faculties early and enshrine life-long learning habits.</p><p>But what about personality? While personality certainly plays a role in life and career success, its development has long been underplayed or ignored. Folk knowledge <a href="https://www.universityofcalifornia.edu/news/can-you-change-your-personality#:~:text=It%20has%20long%20been%20believed,are%20largely%20stable%20and%20inherited.&text=Personality%20traits%2C%20identified%20as%20neuroticism,as%20health%2C%20happiness%20and%20income." target="_blank">views it as immutable</a>, something etched onto us during childhood and inescapable thereafter. More high-brow theories have <a href="https://unfuckyourbrain.com/personality-doesnt-exist/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">dismissed the idea of personality entirely</a>, viewing it as a heuristic for understanding behavior or a responsive by-product to situational stimuli.</p><p>A growing body of research, however, has shown that not only are personality traits real, but <a href="https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2016/06/30/484053435/personality-can-change-over-a-lifetime-and-usually-for-the-better" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">they can be changed over a lifetime</a>. And that growth is an important factor in predicting life and career success.</p>
Success with the Big 5
<p>That's the conclusion of a recent <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0956797620957998" target="_blank">longitudinal study</a> published in Psychological Science. The study followed two samples of Icelandic youths from roughly ages 17 to 29. Its researchers used data across three and five time points to measure the young adults on the Big Five personality traits (openness, extroversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, and emotional stability). It also surveyed them for five indicators of early career success. These were income, degree attainment, occupational prestige, and job and career satisfaction.</p><p>The study's findings showed that personality growth predicted career outcomes better than "adolescent trait levels and crystallized ability." Across both samples, the researchers found extroversion, conscientiousness, and emotional stability to have the strongest effects. Specifically, conscientiousness was tied to career satisfaction, emotional stability to income and career satisfaction, and extroversion to job and career satisfaction.</p><p>"Overall, the findings highlight the importance of personality development throughout childhood, adolescence and young adulthood for promoting different aspects of career success," Kevin Hoff, lead author and assistant professor of industrial-organizational psychology at the University of Houston, <a href="https://uh.edu/news-events/stories/2020/december-2020/12022020-hoff-personality-maturity-career.php" target="_blank">said in a release</a>.</p><p>Hoff believes these results support policies designed to help young people develop personality-based skills. "The study showed you're not just stuck with your personality traits, and if you change over time in positive ways, that can have a big impact on your career," he said.</p><p>According to the release, the study is the first to assess the predictive link between personality growth and career outcomes across a decade of young adulthood. While preliminary, it does fit in with other studies looking into the relationship between personality traits and career success. </p><p><a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1069072703254501" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">A 2003 study</a> published in the Journal of Career Assessment surveyed more than 5,000 individuals. Its results found that conscientiousness, extroversion, and openness correlated with career satisfaction. Similarly, <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1744-6570.1999.tb00174.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">a 2006 study</a> published in Personnel Psychology drew on data from <a href="http://ihd.berkeley.edu/research-centers/inter-generational-studies" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">the Intergenerational Studies</a>. It found that conscientiousness positively predicted extrinsic career success (i.e., income and status) as well as intrinsic success (i.e., job satisfaction).</p>The change you want to be
<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="67cab64f293633035f0c699f71a5d426"><iframe type="lazy-iframe" data-runner-src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/vyJ_hhninDw?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>William James famously penned that personality becomes "<a href="https://www.apa.org/pubs/books/4318271" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">set in plaster</a>" by the age of 30, never to soften again. There's some truth to this. Personality traits do remain relatively stable throughout our lifetimes. Your inherently disorganized friend won't transform into Marie Kondo because they watched a YouTube tutorial on shirt folding.</p><p>But many studies show that our personalities aren't immutable, either. We can remold ourselves well beyond 30, shifting our traits on their continuum in ways that can be either beneficial or deleterious. One such study, <a href="http://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037/pspp0000210" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology</a>, assessed participants' personality traits for 50 years. If found that as people mature over time, they also accumulate personality changes.</p><p>"The rankings (of personality traits) remain fairly consistent. People who are more conscientious than others their age at 16 are likely to be more conscientious than others at 66. On average, everyone becomes more conscientious, more emotionally stable, and more agreeable," Rodica Damian, the study's lead author and the director of the Personality Development and Success Lab at the University of Houston, <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201808/how-do-personality-traits-change-16-66" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">said in a statement</a>.</p><p>Cultivating such growth can be difficult as these traits often require the very talents we feel we lack. To become more extroverted, for example, one needs to be less introverted. It seems both obvious and self-defeating—if one was more outgoing, one would be more outgoing. Because of this, interventions typically focus on actions that alter how we typically think or behave (hence the name cognitive-behavioral therapy). These actions can be small at first, but they have to be deliberate and specific, the so-called <a href="https://bigthink.com/personal-growth/brain-hack-new-years-resolution" target="_self">SMART goals</a>.</p><p>To become more extroverted, introverts don't have to throw lavish, hedonistic house parties to rival those of rock-'n'-roll legends. Instead, the introvert starts by attending a small book club on a specific day and tasking themselves to talk at the meeting This is the first step that makes subsequent steps easier, and after an accumulation of such steps, self-perspective begins to shift. </p><p>"Once you start to change those behaviors, you'll start to change the way you see yourself," <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201604/can-introvert-ever-change" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Susan Krauss Whitbourne</a>, Professor Emerita of Psychology and Brain Science at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, writes. "That change in <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/identity" title="Psychology Today looks at identity" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">identity</a> may provide the key to personality trait change. You change the narrative from 'I've always been an introvert' to 'I've usually engaged in introverted behavior.' Seeing yourself as in charge of your personality rather than being run by it may be the key to having your personality suit instead of define you."</p><p>The same goes for conscientiousness. Taking on tasks and responsibilities that <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/201902/three-potential-ways-become-more-conscientious" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">require one to utilize conscientiousness</a> brings about that change over time. As Damian noted, people typically become more conscientious as they get older. One reason is simply that adulthood requires more diligence, discipline, and self-control than high school and punishes a lack of those traits more harshly. Adult environments also tend to reward and support such characteristics. By realizing that with intention, we can self-furnish our environments to support and foster that change.</p><p>We can also hack our metacognition—the way we think about our thinking—to great effect. Such techniques are often used in <a href="https://cogbtherapy.com/cbt-emotion-regulation" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">emotional regulation therapy </a>to intervene in heightened or easily triggered outbursts. Mindfulness, for example, teaches people to identify their emotions, and the practice helps people from becoming overwhelmed through the act of labeling an emotion as something distinct from themselves. Recognizing the difference between being angry and feeling angry assists in self-modulation.<em></em></p><p>Some techniques and interventions may improve certain personality traits better than others, but they all demonstrate a key takeaway. Practice won't make perfect, but it can shift personality to be more in line with our goals. While personality may not be the only factor in career and life success, self-improvement will pay dividends to both.</p>
Keep reading
Show less
Bruce Lee: How to live successfully in a world with no rules
Shannon Lee shares lessons from her father in her new book, "Be Water, My Friend: The Teachings of Bruce Lee."
27 November, 2020
- Bruce Lee would have turned 80 years old on November 27, 2020. The legendary actor and martial artist's daughter, Shannon Lee, shares some of his wisdom and his philosophy on self help in a new book titled "Be Water, My Friend: The Teachings of Bruce Lee."
- In this video, Shannon shares a story of the fight that led to her father beginning a deeper philosophical journey, and how that informed his unique expression of martial arts called Jeet Kune Do.
- One lesson passed down from Bruce Lee was his use and placement of physical symbols as a way to help "cement for yourself this new way of being, or this new lesson you've learned." By working on ourselves (with the right tools), we can develop the skills necessary to rise and conquer new challenges.
<p class="media-headline"><br></p><div class="rm-shortcode amazon-assets-widget" data-rm-shortcode-id="a0aac8f5557c1669614b18b64a6ff222" contenteditable="false">
<a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250206685?tag=bigthink00-20&linkCode=ogi&th=1&psc=1" target="_blank">
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/41RRzcypduL.jpg" class="amazon-assets-widget__image widget__image">
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__description">
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__title" style="display: block;">Be Water, My Friend: The Teachings of Bruce Lee</div>
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__by-amazon"><!-- <a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250206685?tag=bigthink00-20&linkCode=ogi&th=1&psc=1" target="_blank">by now at amazone</a> --></div>
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__list-price"><span class="grey">List Price: </span><span class="list-price">$19.67</span></div>
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__new-price"><span class="grey">New From: </span><span class="new-price">$18.12</span> <span class="grey">in Stock</span></div>
<div class="amazon-assets-widget__used-price"><span class="grey">Used From: </span><span class="used-price">$18.35</span> <span class="grey">in Stock</span></div>
</div>
</a>
</div>
Keep reading
Show less
Study: 75 percent of women executives have experienced imposter syndrome
A new survey also found that women executives believe imposter syndrome to be common among women in corporate America.
09 October, 2020
Credit: fizkes on Adobe Stock
<ul class="ee-ul"></ul>
<p>Have you ever felt like a fraud? Like, everyone at the office treats you with respect and admires your hard work, but inside you feel artificial. It's as though you have no idea what you're really about, and all it would take is the whisper of a secret activation phrase to crumble your entire façade. Only, instead of revealing that you're secretly an awesome spy with the skills that kill, the phrase reveals a far more humbling reality: You suck.</p><p>If that sounds unsettlingly familiar—and it sure does for me—then you may have experienced <a href="https://bigthink.com/philip-perry/afraid-youll-be-revealed-as-an-impostor-youre-not-alone" target="_self">imposter syndrome</a>. People <a href="https://bigthink.com/mind-brain/imposter-syndrome" target="_self">in the throes of imposter syndrome</a> doubt their skills and accomplishments, worry their successes were the result of good luck, and fear being exposed as beguiling charlatans. This mental pattern, first known as "imposter phenomenon," was introduced in <a href="http://mpowir.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Download-IP-in-High-Achieving-Women.pdf" target="_blank">a 1978 study</a>. For the study, Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Ament Imes interviewed more than 150 highly successful women and discovered a lack of internal acknowledgment to be prevalent.</p><p>In the 40 years since, American women have made incredible strides. They have managed successful companies, held some of the most powerful offices, and <a href="https://www.freethink.com/articles/nobel-prize-in-chemistry" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">won recognition</a> for pushing scientific boundaries. Yet, a new study released by KPMG LLP, a U.S. audit, tax, and advisory firm, suggests imposter syndrome remains as pernicious as ever.</p>
Am I the great pretender?
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNDQ3NzQzOC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyNDI1NzA2Nn0._YO27j8GmJnSeop1mPFxx_sOKg3DorgFFpcfHNYVV98/img.jpg?width=1245&coordinates=0%2C312%2C0%2C312&height=700" id="5201d" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="3474c9bcafb8198254dd798882b99551" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="diverse group meeting" data-width="1245" data-height="700" /><p>For the study, KPMG polled 750 high-performing executive women across a range of industries. Each was a participant at the KPMG Women's Leadership Summit and was within promotional range of a C-suite position. These women had a proven work history of dedication, advancement, and achievement. No one could debate that these executives were anything but stalwart professionals—except, unfortunately, themselves.</p><p>Seventy-five percent of those polled reported having experienced imposter syndrome. Nearly half said those feelings originated from not expecting to reach their level of success and that it becomes lonelier at the top. Eighty-one percent believed they put more pressure on themselves than their male counterparts, leading to a consensus among participants that imposter syndrome is more common among women in corporate America. Three-fourths believed men do not experience feelings of self-doubt at the same level as women.</p><p>"It is important for organizations to gain a more thorough understanding of the specific issues women may face as they advance in their careers and as they move toward the C-suite. We hope the thought-provoking findings and solutions in this study help leaders everywhere as we work to further advance inclusion and diversity," KPMG CEO Paul Knopp said <a href="https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/kpmg-study-finds-75-of-female-executives-across-industries-have-experienced-imposter-syndrome-in-their-careers-301148023.html" target="_blank">in a release</a>.</p><p>The participants did recommend workplace dynamics to ease these burdensome feelings. About half received support from thoughtful performance managers, and a third from rewards and other recognitions of value. And 72 percent said they looked to a mentor or trusted advisor for help and advice when the doubt creeps in.</p><p>"It's important to realize that most women experience similar doubts at some point in our careers," Laura Newinski, KPMG's COO, said in the same release. "Our contribution as leaders is pivotal. Together, we have the opportunity to build corporate environments that foster a sense of belonging and lessen the experience of imposter syndrome for women in our workplaces."</p><p>KPMG published its results as part of its "<a href="https://womensleadership.kpmg.us/content/dam/womensleadership/pdf/kpmg2019wlsreport.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Advancing the Future of Women in Business" report</a>.</p>Fake it till you make it (to the moon)
<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="d991955b6be7f4d226a2e1572edec4f9"><iframe type="lazy-iframe" data-runner-src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/IrTrBNmMXG0?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span><p>Because the original study focused on highly successful women, there's been a misconception that only women suffer from imposter syndrome and the best remedy is for them to "just get over it." Neither is true.</p><p>Regarding the gender gap, there's been much back and forth in the research. <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/men-suffer-from-impostor-syndrome-2016-1" target="_blank">Men certainly suffer</a> from imposter syndrome, and some studies have suggested men <a href="https://qz.com/1296783/it-turns-out-men-not-women-suffer-more-from-imposter-syndrome/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">may be more inclined toward it</a>—at least under specific conditions. But due to social expectations and cultural norms, they may not be as open about it. Other studies have found women, especially women of color and those from the LGBTQ community, to be <a href="https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200724-why-imposter-syndrome-hits-women-and-women-of-colour-harder" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">hit harder by imposter syndrome</a>.</p><p>Thankfully, for both men and women, there are ways to diminish these fraudulent feelings of phoniness. <a href="https://time.com/5312483/how-to-deal-with-impostor-syndrome/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Speaking with Time</a>, imposter syndrome expert Valerie Young recommended reframing your thoughts. We can learn to be mindful of the disruptive thought, relabeling it as a feeling and not a reality. We can learn to appreciate constructive criticism, develop growth mindsets, and push ourselves to ask questions rather than holding back out of fear. And as KPMG's study showed, having a supportive person to speak honestly with can do wonders.</p><p>"The goal is not to never feel like an impostor. The goal for me is to give [people] the tools and the insight and information to talk themselves down faster," Young told Time. "They can still have an impostor moment, but not an impostor life."</p><p>Short of pathological narcissism, I imagine we all have our imposter moments. I think <a href="https://neil-gaiman.tumblr.com/post/160603396711/hi-i-read-that-youve-dealt-with-with-impostor" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">author Neil Gaiman</a> illustrates this best in an anecdote. One night, Gaiman was chatting up a fellow Neil at a very important event filled with very important people who had done very important things. Like Gaiman, the elderly Neil felt he didn't belong in such a prestigious company. That Neil was, of course, Neil Armstrong.</p><p>As Gaiman put it so well: "And I felt a bit better. Because if Neil Armstrong felt like an imposter, maybe everyone did. Maybe there weren't any grown-ups, only people who had worked hard and also got lucky and were slightly out of their depth, all of us doing the best job we could, which is all we can really hope for."</p>
Keep reading
Show less
No, opposites do not attract
The problem is that what's true of magnets is not at all true of romance.
30 August, 2020
Brent Lewin/Getty Images
Everyone seems to agree that opposites attract.
<p> Young and old people, happy and distressed couples, single folks and married partners – all apparently buy the classic adage about love. <a href="https://books.google.com/books/about/Opposites_attack.html" target="_blank">Relationship experts</a> <a href="https://books.google.com/books/about/I_Love_You_But_why_are_We_So_Different.html" target="_blank">have written</a> <a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/opposites-attract-renee-baron/1103372924">books</a> based on this assumption. It's even been internalized by people who are on the hunt for a partner, with 86 percent of those looking for love saying they're <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490800600406" target="_blank">seeking someone with opposite traits</a>.</p><p>The problem is that what's true of magnets is not at all true of romance. As I explain in my book, “<a href="http://www.wiley.com/buy/978-1-118-52128-1" target="_blank">Great Myths of Intimate Relationships: Dating, Sex, and Marriage</a>," people tend to be attracted to those who are similar – not opposite – to themselves.</p>
<h2>I love how you're just like me</h2><p>Whether people <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.72.3.592" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">really find opposites more attractive</a> has been the subject of many scientific studies. Researchers have investigated what combination makes for better romantic partners – those who are similar, different, or opposite? Scientists call these three possibilities the homogamy hypothesis, the heterogamy hypothesis and the complementarity hypothesis, respectively.</p><p>The clear winner is homogamy. Since the 1950s, social scientists have conducted over 240 studies to determine whether similarity in terms of <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/h0045531" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">attitudes</a>, <a href="http://doi.org/10.1177/0146167291174010" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">personality traits</a>, <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.53.6.1052" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">outside interests</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/0022-1031(81)90009-3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">values</a> and <a href="http://doi.org/10.1111/j.1540-4560.1976.tb02485.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">other characteristics</a> leads to attraction. In 2013, psychologists Matthew Montoya and Robert Horton examined the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407512452989" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">combined results of these studies</a> in what's called a meta-analysis. They found an irrefutable association between being similar to and being interested in the other person.</p><p>In other words, there is clear and convincing evidence that birds of a feather flock together. For human beings, the attractiveness of similarity is so strong that it is found <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2009.01217.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">across cultures</a>.</p><p>Because similarity is associated with attraction, it makes sense that individuals in committed relationships tend to be alike in many ways. Sometimes this is called <a href="http://doi.org/10.1177/0192513x12459020" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">assortative mating</a>, although this term is more often used to describe the ways in which people with similar levels of educational attainment, financial means and <a href="http://doi.org/10.2307/2786870" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">physical appearance</a> tend to pair up.</p><p>None of this necessarily means that opposites don't attract. Both the homogamy hypothesis and the complementarity hypothesis could be true. So is there scientific support that opposites might attract at least some of the time?</p>
<h2>Filling in my weak spots with your strengths</h2><p>Love stories often include people finding partners who seem to have traits that they lack, like a good girl falling for a bad boy. In this way, they appear to complement one another. For example, one spouse might be outgoing and funny while the other is shy and serious. It's easy to see how both partners could view the other as ideal – one partner's strengths balancing out the other partner's weaknesses. In fact, one could imagine the friends and relatives of a shy person trying to set them up with an outgoing person to draw the shy one out. The question is whether people actually seek out complementary partners or if that just happens in the movies.</p><p>As it turns out, it's pure fiction. There is essentially no research evidence that differences in personality, interests, education, politics, upbringing, religion or other traits lead to greater attraction.</p><p>For example, in one study researchers found that college students preferred descriptions of mates whose written bios were <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.85.4.709" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">similar to themselves or their ideal self</a> over those described as complementing themselves. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167298243004" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Other studies</a> have supported this finding. For example, <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/h0031699" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">introverts are no more attracted to extraverts</a> than they are to anyone else.</p>
<h2>Why are we so sure opposites attract?</h2><p>Despite the overwhelming evidence, why does the myth of heterogamy endure? There are probably a few factors at work here.</p><p>First, <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0096-1523.24.5.1315" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">contrasts tend to stand out</a>. Even if the partners in a couple match on tons of characteristics, they may end up arguing about the <a href="https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/acceptance-and-change-in-couple-therapy-andrew-christensen/1103810614?ean=9780393702903" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">ways in which they are different</a>.</p><p>Beyond that, there's evidence that <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/h0044134" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">small differences</a> between spouses can become larger over time. In their self-help book "<a href="https://www.guilford.com/books/Reconcilable-Differences/Christensen-Doss-Jacobson/9781462502431" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Reconcilable Differences</a>," psychologists Andrew Christensen, Brian Doss and Neil Jacobson describe how partners move into roles that are complementary over time.</p><p>For example, if one member of a couple is slightly more humorous than the other, the couple may settle into a pattern in which the slightly-more-funny spouse claims the role of "the funny one" while the slightly-less-funny spouse slots into the role of "the serious one." Scientists have demonstrated that, yes, partners <a href="http://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2001.tb00038.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">grow more complementary over time</a>; while they may begin as quite alike, they find ways to differentiate themselves by degree.</p><p>In the end, people's attraction to differences is vastly outweighed by our attraction to similarities. People persist in thinking opposites attract – when in reality, relatively similar partners just become a bit more complementary as time goes by.<img src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/88839/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation"></p><p><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/matthew-d-johnson-254463" target="_blank">Matthew D. Johnson</a>, Chair & Professor of Psychology and Director of the Marriage and Family Studies Laboratory, <em><a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/binghamton-university-state-university-of-new-york-2252" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Binghamton University, State University of New York</a></em></p><p>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/no-opposites-do-not-attract-88839" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">original article</a>.</p>
Keep reading
Show less
Popular
