Redefining Perfection and Other Strategies For Self-Assessment

One of the many ways we tend to cause ourselves stress is in the terms by which we evaluate ourselves. A shifting of the personal paradigm can lead to a happier existence.

What's the Latest?

One of the many ways we cause ourselves stress is in how we evaluate ourselves. It is, after all, often true that we're our own toughest critic. All it takes is one bad review and one's self-image is shattered.  

Shifting the vocabulary of self-assessment is key to a happier existence. This is according to Jaime Kulaga, a life coach who contributes to ForbesWoman. Kulaga authored a post a few days ago offering suggestions for better self-talk and recommendations for a shift in the vernacular of personal evaluation. Language is culture's most powerful emblem and tool; we may as well make it work for us.

What's the Big Idea?

The first of Kulaga's three suggestions is the excision of words such as “have to,” “must” and “should” when making goals or assessments. Such words boost stress and anxiety when the things we ascribe them to don't actually "have to" be done right at that moment. Kulaga's second suggestion is a redefining of "perfection," or perhaps more appropriately, the replacing of "perfection" with "self-actualization." Although Kulaga writes mainly for women, all people could probably improve their lives by thinking less about what it would take to achieve perfection and more about how to reach one's fullest potential. Finally, Kulaga asks her readers to step back and appreciate the grays in life; not everything is so black and white. There is room between "did" and "did not" or "all" and "nothing at all." The key to better mental well-being is finding where in the gray you feel most comfortable.

Keep reading at Forbes

Photo credit: Volodymyr Burdiak / Shutterstock

Big Think Edge
  • The meaning of the word 'confidence' seems obvious. But it's not the same as self-esteem.
  • Confidence isn't just a feeling on your inside. It comes from taking action in the world.
  • Join Big Think Edge today and learn how to achieve more confidence when and where it really matters.
  • Prejudice is typically perpetrated against 'the other', i.e. a group outside our own.
  • But ageism is prejudice against ourselves — at least, the people we will (hopefully!) become.
  • Different generations needs to cooperate now more than ever to solve global problems.

Active ingredient in Roundup found in 95% of studied beers and wines

The controversial herbicide is everywhere, apparently.

Surprising Science
  • U.S. PIRG tested 20 beers and wines, including organics, and found Roundup's active ingredient in almost all of them.
  • A jury on August 2018 awarded a non-Hodgkin's lymphoma victim $289 million in Roundup damages.
  • Bayer/Monsanto says Roundup is totally safe. Others disagree.
Keep reading Show less

Scientists see 'rarest event ever recorded' in search for dark matter

The team caught a glimpse of a process that takes 18,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years.

Image source: Pixabay
Surprising Science
  • In Italy, a team of scientists is using a highly sophisticated detector to hunt for dark matter.
  • The team observed an ultra-rare particle interaction that reveals the half-life of a xenon-124 atom to be 18 sextillion years.
  • The half-life of a process is how long it takes for half of the radioactive nuclei present in a sample to decay.
Keep reading Show less