Dear ______ , I Love You. But the Gay Jokes Just Aren’t Funny Anymore.
Forget sticks and stones: Language is powerful. Ash Beckham argues that if we want to build better communities for all stakeholders, it's vital to frame our language around inclusion and empathy.
Ash Beckham: When people are using the word, "gay" in any social context I think that it’s really important to figure out the intent of what they’re saying. A huge part of people being in the closet for so long was because nobody wanted to utter those words and I think that there is — when it’s used in an appropriate way, there’s a really strong sense of pride and identity that comes with that and I think that that’s really important. If it’s ever, you know, ranking something or speaking of something negatively or putting it down a peg or down a notch, that’s when there’s just other words to use. There’s better words to use that don’t carry that weight to people in the room. And you might not even know who those people are. You might not even know how that word affects somebody. You could be talking about their mom or their aunt or their dad. We hold each other accountable to not use those words because then it conveys the sentiment that gay is less than.
Empathy is such a critical part of this in creating empathetic communities, specifically in schools but in other places — in your community, in your place of worship, in your house. We need to create these empathetic environments. And the way that we create empathy is by sharing our stories. And the way that you have that conversation about those words, you know, "gay" being used in a negative way. People don’t respond to no you shouldn’t say that. They really respond to when you say that it makes me feel dot, dot, dot. And there’s something incredibly vulnerable about that, especially around the word "gay." Sometimes that’s kids outing themselves when they don’t necessarily want to which is such a huge role for allies to be able to stand up and say, "That word’s not okay because it makes me feel dot, dot, dot. Not because I’m gay, but because I have friends that are gay and you’re speaking of them in a pejorative way or you’re putting them as a negative connotation to something that they use as a prideful descriptor." You know, there comes a point if you are transgender and you insist that your uncle, you know, everybody’s got like a crazy uncle. Mine is Uncle George. He’s crazy. Like you never know what he’s going to say. But you give him the benefit of the doubt and you expect that he will be better at that. But if after you approach him and say hey, you know, the gay jokes aren’t funny or I’ve asked you to use my preferred pronoun and you’re just not. Like I think there’s a part of intention to assume that, you know, somebody without a tremendous amount of background in it is going to be able to, you know, by choice switch the pronoun that they’ve called somebody for 25 years. I don’t think it’s a fair expectation.
It took us a while to figure out that we were gay and to come to terms with that and handle that and be able to say that out loud. We have to give people in our lives that we care about that permission to do the same thing. But after a certain amount of time, if there’s no remorse or I mean I think especially with people that we’re close to we really — you can tell when someone’s trying or if they’re stumbling or if they’re not. So I think we give them the benefit of the doubt as long as it feels right to us and that relationship is still important. But when we come to the realization that they actually are not trying and not trying to be educated and not having those conversations, then maybe they can’t change or maybe there’s a way to employ other family members or allies or friends to go in and have that conversation in a better way. But, you know, I don’t — there’s so many people in the world that are putting out positive energy and that, you know, you’re going to get so much farther. And if you need to let somebody go because of their inability to try to change with you and be respectful of you that’s just kind of the way it goes sometimes which is hard I think. Obviously especially if it’s family members, but, you know, no one has the right to stop you from being you and from respecting you and you need to hold people to that.
Forget sticks and stones: Language is powerful. Ash Beckham argues that if we want to build better communities for all stakeholders, it's vital to frame our language around inclusion and empathy. It's not simply about a judicious selection of vocabulary. It's thoughtfulness and respect for individuals as human beings.
These thought leaders, founders, and entrepreneurs are propelling the kind of future we want to be a part of.
- The tech industry may be dominated by men in terms of numbers, but there are lots of brilliant women in leadership positions that are changing the landscape.
- The women on this list are founders of companies dedicated to teaching girls to code, innovators in the fields of AI, VR, and machine learning, leading tech writers and podcasters, and CEOs of companies like YouTube and Project Include.
- This list is by no means all-encompassing. There are many more influential women in tech that you should seek out and follow.
The results of this study showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence, declining in early adulthood and then climbing back up again into one's early 30s.
- A 2020 Michigan State University study examined the link between teen social networks and the levels of depression later in life.
- This study used data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health, specifically targeting social network data. The results showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence and declining in early adulthood, then climbing back up again into one's early 30s.
- There are several ways you can attempt to stay active and socially connected while battling depression, according to experts.
The study suggested that teenagers who have a smaller social circle showed higher rated of depression later on in life.
Credit: asiandelight/Shutterstock<p><a href="https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2020-09/msu-tsn093020.php" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">A 2020 Michigan State University study</a> examined the link between teen social networks and the levels of depression later in life. The results of this study suggested teens who have a larger number of friends in adolescent years may be less likely to suffer from depression later in life. These findings were especially prominent in women.</p><p>This study used data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health, specifically targeting social network data. This data asks students to select up to 5 male and 5 female friends and indicate how often they felt depressive symptoms. </p><p>MSU Sociology Assistant Professor Molly Copeland and lead author Christina Kamis (Sociology doctoral candidate at Duke University) published the study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior in September. </p><p><strong>Female teenagers may struggle more with depression during their teen years but show fewer depressive symptoms later in life.</strong> </p><p>For female adolescents, popularity can lead to increased depression during their teen years. However, this ultimately may lead to lasting benefits of fewer depressive symptoms later in life. "Adolescence (is) a sensitive period of early life when structural facets of social relationships can have lasting mental health consequences," Copeland wrote, adding that "compared to boys, girls face additional risks from how others view their social position in adolescence."</p><p>Throughout this study, men showed no association between popularity and depressive symptoms, however, they did show benefits from naming more friends. As for why this is, Copeland has a theory: perhaps the expectations on young girls (compared to young boys) as well as the roles that lead to popularity can create a kind of stress and strain felt more prominently by girls than boys. </p><p>While this does create more difficult teen years for young girls, the stress and strain may lead to giving these girls a psychological skillset that benefits them later in life, allowing them to deal with stressful situations more easily.</p><p>The study also suggested that teenagers who have a smaller social circle showed higher rates of depression later on in life. </p><p><strong>Results from both men and women followed a U-shaped trajectory of depressive symptoms.</strong></p><p>The results showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence and declining in early adulthood, then climbing back up again into one's early 30s. This was particularly more noticeable in women, who showed a steeper decline in symptoms between the ages of 18-26, followed by a more rapid increase in symptoms in their early 30s. </p>
How to stay social while battling depression<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNDQ1MjA3MC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxNDMyNDY1N30.e1ULIJ5QYXh4H1SGUPUTJqYBCnX2XWp6InjPRr-2Bdw/img.jpg?width=1245&coordinates=0%2C22%2C0%2C22&height=700" id="832fd" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="b360bb24fb8d6025680bfffb52fd5982" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="depression support group illustration" />
Attending support groups, planning activities with family or even just a weekly phone call to a friend can help alleviate depression.
Credit: Mascha Tace/Shutterstock<p>Although maintaining relationships can help you cope, it can also be one of the most difficult things to do when you're experiencing depression.</p><p>As Dr. Jennifer L. Payne (an assistant professor/co-director of the Women's Mood Disorders Center at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore) <a href="https://www.everydayhealth.com/hs/major-depression/staying-socially-active-with-depression/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">tells Everyday Health</a>: "One of the common symptoms of depression is social isolation." </p><p>Payne goes on to explain that you can "soak up some energy" by simply being around other people, moving around, and staying active.</p><p><strong>Creating a daily schedule and planning activities ensures action. </strong></p><p>While it may be easy to turn down last-minute plans, it's more difficult to cancel plans you've already committed to with friends and family. While it's important not to overwhelm yourself with a packed schedule, creating a minimal daily schedule that involves seeing friends and family or doing activities that you've previously enjoyed can ensure you stay active and often makes you feel more accomplished at the end of each day. </p><p><strong>Support groups and social networking with people who understand. </strong></p><p>While depression can very easily make you feel isolated and alone, surrounding yourself with others who may be struggling with depression as well can help in multiple ways. You will have peer support from people who relate to how you're feeling plus the added benefit of being around people, which can raise your spirits. </p><p><strong>Keeping a journal (and setting goals) can help you feel accomplished. </strong></p><p>Keep a thought journal and detail certain daily or weekly goals (such as a plan to call a friend on Monday or to visit your local coffee shop for a change of scenery on Thursday). These small, achievable goals not only get you out of the house and/or interacting with others, but they also provide a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction once they are complete. </p><p><strong>Random acts of kindness, such as volunteering, will make you feel good. </strong></p><p><a href="https://bigthink.com/mind-brain/kindness-benefits-james-doty?utm_term=Autofeed&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Twitter#Echobox=1596517476" target="_self">Being kind is good for your health</a> in many different ways. Doing something nice for others can boost your serotonin levels. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that is responsible for feelings of satisfaction and well-being. Similar to exercise, kindness, and altruism can also release endorphins, creating a <a href="https://www.quietrev.com/6-science-backed-ways-being-kind-is-good-for-your-health/#:~:text=Kindness%20releases%20feel%2Dgood%20hormones&text=Doing%20nice%20things%20for%20others,as%20a%20%E2%80%9Chelper's%20high.%E2%80%9D" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">temporary sense of euphoria</a> that can help combat depressive symptoms. </p>
Researchers have just discovered the remains of a hybrid human.
90,000 years ago, a young girl lived in a cave in the Altai mountains in southern Siberia. Her life was short; she died in her early teens, but she stands at a unique point in human evolution. She is the first known hybrid of two different kinds of ancient humans: the Neanderthals and the Denisovans.
Physicists create quantum entanglement, making two distant objects behave as one.