Nina DiSesa: What lessons have you learned from working in a

Nina DiSesa: I had the biggest half for me as a women working in boys clubs was that I couldn’t, even though I was angry be an equity of the business or I would be angry at the way a man would treat me or other women, I couldn’t really show that and if I got angry if they saw my anger, they would just close down and not listen to me and not really regard me. I have to learn my big epiphany was to try and find something that I really loved about the men, something really enduring and concentrate on that, so that I could manipulate the situation. Men will respond to kindness and affection and praise much quicker then they will respond to yelling at them and telling them that they did something wrong and I kind of learn this when I was really young. My first husband, who was an actor, was a Sicilian and he couldn’t help her around the house, it wasn’t that he didn’t want to, is that he was the first born Sicilian son and he couldn’t do the dishes or clean up so, I work the full time job and I cleaned and I marketed and I cooked and I cleaned up after dinner and I was exhausted and one day I bought a really heavy duty vacuum cleaner and use it for David, so then I said “you know what I am returning this vacuum cleaner, its too much for me, I cannot even wheel it around” and he said “I will do it,” he said “I will do it,” that because it was a manly thing, so he takes a right and for two years he did all the vacuuming and I thought it was fabulous, because he was helping me, he was the man doing the vacuum clean, I positioned it differently and I did not even know it at that time, that I was manipulating him, in a charming way, but because every time vacuumed I really gushed all over him and twice he actually cook dinner, he took a roast out of the refrigerator and he could not meal them, which he was not cooking dinner, I didn’t divorce him anyway, because the dinner did not work out, actually he broke up with me, in an elevator. That is the first page of the book, how he broke up with me in an elevator of the cad, but that’s kind of what I did, I am not a dictatorial person, I was not a good dictator. I knew that I wasn’t going to able to order people around, it was in my nature and I am a women, women don’t do that, its not accepted when a women is a dictator. So, I had to find other ways to get people to do the things that I wanted them to do, so that charming seduction and manipulation was a good way for me to do that. Recorded on: 2/29/08

Men respond to kindness, not criticism.

LinkedIn meets Tinder in this mindful networking app

Swipe right to make the connections that could change your career.

Getty Images
Sponsored
Swipe right. Match. Meet over coffee or set up a call.

No, we aren't talking about Tinder. Introducing Shapr, a free app that helps people with synergistic professional goals and skill sets easily meet and collaborate.

Keep reading Show less

Brain study finds circuits that may help you keep your cool

Research by neuroscientists at MIT's Picower Institute for Learning and Memory helps explain how the brain regulates arousal.

Photo by CHARLY TRIBALLEAU / AFP/ Getty Images
Mind & Brain

MIT News

The big day has come: You are taking your road test to get your driver's license. As you start your mom's car with a stern-faced evaluator in the passenger seat, you know you'll need to be alert but not so excited that you make mistakes. Even if you are simultaneously sleep-deprived and full of nervous energy, you need your brain to moderate your level of arousal so that you do your best.

Keep reading Show less

34 years ago, a KGB defector chillingly predicted modern America

A disturbing interview given by a KGB defector in 1984 describes America of today and outlines four stages of mass brainwashing used by the KGB.

Politics & Current Affairs
  • Bezmenov described this process as "a great brainwashing" which has four basic stages.
  • The first stage is called "demoralization" which takes from 15 to 20 years to achieve.
  • According to the former KGB agent, that is the minimum number of years it takes to re-educate one generation of students that is normally exposed to the ideology of its country.
Keep reading Show less

How pharmaceutical companies game the patent system

When these companies compete, in the current system, the people lose.

Top Video Splash
  • When a company reaches the top of the ladder, they typically kick it away so that others cannot climb up on it. The aim? So that another company can't compete.
  • When this happens in the pharmaceutical world, certain companies stay at the top of the ladder, through broadly-protected patents, at the cost of everyday people benefitting from increased competition.
  • Since companies have worked out how to legally game the system, Amin argues we need to get rid of this "one size fits all" system, which treats product innovation — "tweaks" — the same as product invention.