Since I’ve run out of blog ideas—and have New Year’s Eve parties to get to—today I’m just going to post some of the things that people who are more interesting than I am have been saying on Twitter this year. Because that’s what journalists do. So, without further ado, here—curated with the the help of Favorious—is the first part of my annual round-up of political commentary from the brilliant and childish patriots who make fun of stuff online. My earlier round-up of health care reform tweets is here. Thanks to everyone for their unwitting contributions to my blog—and happy New Year!
@JennyJohnsonHi5: An email from my parents: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: Obama’s a Muslim
@capricecrane: “1 in 5 Americans Thinks Obama Is Muslim.” I’ll bet they’re the dentists who don’t recommend sugarless gum for their patients who chew gum.
@thebenbrooks: I just changed my Obama bumper sticker to, “Yes we could have.”
@Mike_FTW: I miss the Obama I voted for.
Scott Brown’s Election
@gruber: Republicans now hold 41-59 majority in Senate.
@Trick_or_tweet: I’d stage an angry protest against Scott Brown & the death of health care reform, but I can’t afford to get hurt.
@Bauart: This is *REALLY* bad news for Democrats… a Republican win in Massachusetts means Ted Kennedy’s bar tab is due.
@giromide: Half of my Facebook friends applaud Scott Brown. The other half jeer him. Mom announced her bountiful harvest in FarmVille.
@brilliantorange: Just for the hell of it, somebody ask Sarah Palin about the situation with West Korea and Narnia.
@joeschmitt: Sarah Palin is doing a reality show for TLC, which should be interesting because reality isn’t exactly her strong suit.
@shariv67: I’d pay a grand to hear Dan Akroyd say it just once. “Palin, you ignorant slut.”
The Tea Party
@CroweJam: Drove by one of those Tea Party rallies. Looked like a Walmart without the building.
@rationalists: I attended a tea party in England. The scones were delightful and no one made an ass of themselves pretending they knew economics.
@lafix: The kids outside are having a tea party. They’ve drawn a Hitler mustache on Barbie, they’ve deported Dora and their spelling is atrocious.
@CroweJam: I think the Tea Party movement is America’s cry for help. With spelling.
@jasonmustian: Not to get too political, but those “Life Begins at Forty” bumper stickers might be taking the whole pro-choice thing a bit far.
@thebenbrooks: Dear right wingers: What’s your position on abortion if a test could prove the baby would be the next Nancy Pelosi?
@CcSteff: Nothing has made me more pro-choice than being pregnant.
@MrBigFists: This census and tax stuff is crap. I want to live in a country that doesn’t assign homework.
@jasonpermenter: They want to census but isn’t it about time we censTHEM, Americans??
@gneicco: If the Census required people to report on their neighbors rather than themselves, the response rate would be up near 100 percent.
@abigvictory: The head of Gollum, the body of George “The Animal” Steel and the tattoos of a felon. Ladies and Gentlemen, meet my U.S. Census Worker.
@robhuebel: Census guy came to my door and asked me if I was the only one who lived here. I said, “this sounds like the start of a porno film.” He left.
@SeoulBrother: Me? I followed this African environmental activist dude on Twitter for like a week. What have you done about climate change?
@gknauss: Just so I’m straight on this: You’re “skeptical” about climate change, but dead sure on the God thing?
@Moltz: Seriously, though. You do know that 90% of greenhouse gases come from steampunk cosplayers, right?
The Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill
@CroweJam: Obama has been too slow in responding to the oil mess in the Gulf. Bush would have invaded another country by now.
@BPGlobalPR: OMG This isss ridciulsus. playing a drinking gamee where we drink a shot everytme we seeee an oily birdddd!!! LOL! so wasted!!11
@BPGlobalPR: We’ve created something that will affect your children’s children. Can YOU say the same about YOUR life?
@TheBosha: Show me on this irreplaceable ecosystem where BP touched you.