Over the past year I have struggled through an attempt at becoming a more disciplined man. Paul tells us that we are to work out our own salvation through fear and trembling. However, he follows it up by reminding that it is God who works through us both to will and to act according to His good purpose. This paradox has been difficult for me as I have endeavored to become more disciplined, to work out my faith. I wonder sometimes if this lack of consistent discipline is because I am not working out my salvation hard enough or well enough or if it is because I am getting in God's way. But if I get out of His way, how can I be working out my salvation. This paradox has been frustrating but I have learned that I must find this balance. I must work understanding that it is God who is at work in me. Discipline, as with any other good thing, will come as I meet that balance of striving after becoming more like Him through allowing Him to work in me.