Be an individual, just like everyone else. Laurie Essig at True/Slant says American culture prioritizes creativity in romantic relationships in a way that dictates conformity and materialism. "At some level of the cultural unconscious, we know we are in fact doing exactly what is expected of us, what everyone ought to be doing," says Essig who finds the expectation to be creative in romance too lockstep. "And so, we attempt to both march lockstep with the ruling ideology of romance and simultaneously mark it as 'our own.' Imagine lemmings each in a different brightly colored wig as they fall off the cliff that is true love."