Learn the art of conversation, with comedian Pete Holmes
We have a new range of skills coming to Big Think Edge this week, including communication, critical thinking, and emotional intelligence.
- At Big Think Edge this week, we delve into ways you can make your conversations sing. So to speak.
- Learn a valuable lesson about psychopaths, from diagnosed psychopath (and neuroscientsit) James Fallon.
- If you're not a subscriber yet, join Big Think Edge today. Boost your skills with our 7-day free trial.
To get what you want — to get what everyone wants — learn the 3 levels of listening with Michelle Tillis Lederman's video lesson this week at Big Think Edge. Former Facebook investor Roger McNamee helps you revisit your past decisions to make sure they still make sense and support your goals and beliefs (it's something he knows a lot about).
In Deep Dives this week, you'll learn how conversations can go so much better than they often have, with 36 questions that'll make anyone fall in love. You'll also learn how to handle psychopaths with care, under the tutelage of neuroscientist James Fallon, who is a diagnosed psychopath.
Building relationships through likability: Listen to understand (the 3 levels of listening), with Michelle Lederman
Photo: Joel Mwakasege via Unsplash
Michelle Tillis Lederman, author of The 11 Laws of Likability, explains how to develop listening skills that can help you establish strong, mutually beneficial relationships. Much of our listening involves matching up another person's story to what's happened in our own lives, and that's fine, but it's just first-level listening. Lederman introduces you to the next two levels, in which your understanding deepens and areas of overlapping interest and goals emerge, pointing the way toward a productive connection that works for everyone.
Available September 16 in Boost Your Emotional Intelligence
Fix your mistakes: How to revisit your decisions and realign them to your values, with Roger McNamee
Roger McNamee is the author of Zucked, and he tells an illuminating story of how his faith in Facebook lasted longer than it should have. An opinion or a decision is a hypothesis, he suggests, that may just seem correct for now. However, conflicting evidence can pop up at any time, and you do yourself no favors by ignoring it even if—especially if—it undermines your belief. McNamee's tale will have you re-examining your own past decisions in the hopes of never finding yourself, as he did, on the wrong side of what you believe to be right.
"GOOD DECISION-MAKERS THINK LIKE REAL-TIME ANTHROPOLOGISTS."
– ROGER MCNAMEE
Available September 18 in Boost Your Analytical Intelligence
Deep Dive: No more awkward conversations
We all want to have better, more meaningful conversations, right? That's what comedian, actor, and podcaster Pete Holmes asks in a Deep Dive this week called "Do Your Conversations Fall Flat? Do a 180 by Fostering Intimacy." Holmes shares some of his methods for helping podcast guests open up and be real, from his declaring the conversation a safe space to his trust in the benefits of artful interruption.
What if you want to connect with a total stranger? Psychologist Arthur Aaron's got just the thing for getting intimate with someone else, and fast: 36 questions designed to help you fall in love with anyone.
Available September 16 in Deep Dives
More From Big Think Edge
Related Articles
Teen popularity linked to increased depression in adolescence, decreased depression in adulthood
The results of this study showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence, declining in early adulthoot and then climbing back up again into one's early 30s.
October 01, 2020
Photo by Dragana Gordic on Shutterstock
Mind & Brain
- A 2020 Michigan State University study examined the link between teen social networks and the levels of depression later in life.
- This study used data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health, specifically targeting social network data. The results showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence and declining in early adulthood, then climbing back up again into one's early 30s.
- There are several ways you can attempt to stay active and socially connected while battling depression, according to experts.
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Study shows teens who have more friends may be less likely to suffer from depression as adults
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNDQ1MjA3MS9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMjgyODEyNn0.XrE4VbZm4h9pqGxE2OofGHyw-cD78SxZhbOSTPyTZPM/img.jpg?width=1245&coordinates=0%2C52%2C0%2C52&height=700" id="1e9e2" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="831359bc08f8626bb576f790b0b85836" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="concept of teenage depression depression in adolescence" />The study suggested that teenagers who have a smaller social circle showed higher rated of depression later on in life.
Image by asiandelight on Shutterstock
<p><a href="https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2020-09/msu-tsn093020.php" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">A 2020 Michigan State University study</a> examined the link between teen social networks and the levels of depression later in life. The results of this study suggested teens who have a larger number of friends in adolescent years may be less likely to suffer from depression later in life. These findings were especially prominent in women.</p><p>This study used data from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health, specifically targeting social network data. This data asks students to select up to 5 male and 5 female friends and indicate how often they felt depressive symptoms. </p><p>MSU Sociology Assistant Professor Molly Copeland and lead author Christina Kamis (Sociology doctoral candidate at Duke University) published the study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior in September. </p><p><strong>Female teenagers may struggle more with depression during their teen years but show fewer depressive symptoms later in life.</strong> </p><p>For female adolescents, popularity can lead to increased depression during their teen years. However, this ultimately may lead to lasting benefits of fewer depressive symptoms later in life.</p><p><em>"Adolescence (is) a sensitive period of early life when structural facets of social relationships can have lasting mental health consequences..." </em>Copeland went on to explain: <em>"Compared to boys, girls face additional risks from how others view their social position in adolescence."</em></p><p>Throughout this study, men showed no association between popularity and depressive symptoms, however, they did show benefits from naming more friends. As for why this is, Copeland has a theory: perhaps the expectations on young girls (compared to young boys) as well as the roles that lead to popularity can create a kind of stress and strain felt more prominently by girls than boys. </p><p>While this does create more difficult teen years for young girls, the stress and strain may lead to giving these girls a psychological skillset that benefits them later in life, allowing them to deal with stressful situations more easily.</p><p>The study also suggested that teenagers who have a smaller social circle showed higher rates of depression later on in life. </p><p><strong>Results from both men and women followed a U-shaped trajectory of depressive symptoms.</strong></p><p>The results showed depressive symptoms being highest in adolescence and declining in early adulthood, then climbing back up again into one's early 30s. This was particularly more noticeable in women, who showed a steeper decline in symptoms between the ages of 18-26, followed by a more rapid increase in symptoms in their early 30s. </p>How to stay social while battling depression
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNDQ1MjA3MC9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxNDMyNDY1N30.e1ULIJ5QYXh4H1SGUPUTJqYBCnX2XWp6InjPRr-2Bdw/img.jpg?width=1245&coordinates=0%2C22%2C0%2C22&height=700" id="832fd" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="cd648a11ed282f800f2f86bc3f35daa4" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" alt="depression support group concept of depressive symptoms peer support group" />Attending support groups, planning activities with family or even just a weekly phone call to a friend can help alleviate depression.
Image by Mascha Tace on Shutterstock
<p>Although maintaining relationships can help you cope with depressive symptoms, it can also be one of the most difficult things to do when you're experiencing depression.</p> <p>Jennifer L. Payne, MD, Ph.D. (and assistant professor/co-director of the Women's Mood Disorders Center at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore) <a href="https://www.everydayhealth.com/hs/major-depression/staying-socially-active-with-depression/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">explains to Everyday Health</a>: "One of the common symptoms of depression is social isolation…" </p> <p>Payne goes on to explain that you can "soak up some energy" by simply being around other people, moving around, staying active, etc.</p> <p><strong>Creating a daily schedule and planning activities ensures action. </strong></p><p>While it may be easy to turn down last-minute plans, it's more difficult to cancel plans you've already committed to with friends and family. While it's important not to overwhelm yourself with a packed schedule, creating a minimal daily schedule that involves seeing friends and family or doing activities that you've previously enjoyed can ensure you stay active and often makes you feel more accomplished at the end of each day. </p> <p><strong>Support groups and social networking with people who understand. </strong></p><p>While depression can very easily make you feel isolated and alone, surrounding yourself with others who may be struggling with depression as well can help in multiple ways. You will have peer support from people who relate to how you're feeling plus the added benefit of being around people, which can raise your spirits. </p> <p><strong>Keeping a journal (and setting goals) can help you feel accomplished. </strong></p><p>Keeping a thought journal and detailing certain daily or weekly goals (such as a plan to call a friend on Monday or to visit your local coffee shop for a change of scenery on Thursday). These small, achievable goals not only get you out of the house and/or interacting with others but they also provide a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction once they are complete. </p> <p><strong>Random acts of kindness, such as volunteering, will make you feel good. </strong></p><p><a href="https://bigthink.com/mind-brain/kindness-benefits-james-doty?utm_term=Autofeed&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Twitter#Echobox=1596517476" target="_self">Being kind is good for your health</a> in many different ways. Doing something nice for others can boost your serotonin levels. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that is responsible for feelings of satisfaction and well-being. Similar to exercise, kindness, and altruism can also release endorphins, creating a <a href="https://www.quietrev.com/6-science-backed-ways-being-kind-is-good-for-your-health/#:~:text=Kindness%20releases%20feel%2Dgood%20hormones&text=Doing%20nice%20things%20for%20others,as%20a%20%E2%80%9Chelper's%20high.%E2%80%9D" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">temporary sense of euphoria</a> that can help combat depressive symptoms. </p>
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In quantum entanglement first, scientists link distant large objects
Physicists create quantum entanglement, making two distant objects behave as one.
September 30, 2020
Niels Bohr Institute
Surprising Science
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<p>Scientists entangled two large quantum objects, both at different locations from each other, in a quantum mechanics first. The feat is a step towards practical application of a rather counterintuitive phenomenon and was accomplished by a team from the Niels Bohr Institute at the University of Copenhagen.</p><p>Entanglement is the magical-sounding concept, <a href="https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/guest-blog/the-joys-of-quantum-entanglement/" target="_blank">dubbed</a> "spooky action at a distance" by Einstein. It involves a link is made between two objects that can make them behave like one. This technique is of paramount importance to quantum communication and quantum sensing, explained the University's <a href="https://phys.org/news/2020-09-quantum-entanglement-distant-large.html" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">press release.</a></p><p>The researchers, led by Professor Eugene Polzik, used light particles photons to create an entanglement between a mechanical oscillator ("a vibrating dielectric membrane") and a cloud of atoms, with each acting like a tiny magnet or "spin". They picked these particular objects because atoms can be made to process quantum information while the membrane can store that information. </p>
<p style="margin-left: 20px;">"With this new technique, we are on route to pushing the boundaries of the possibilities of entanglement," stated professor Polzik. "The bigger the objects, the further apart they are, the more disparate they are, the more interesting entanglement becomes from both fundamental and applied perspectives. With the new result, entanglement between very different objects has become possible."</p><p>By entangling the systems, the scientists made them move in correlation with each other. If one object went left, so did the other.</p><p>The achievement can pave the way to new sensing technologies. One example would be getting rid of noisy fluctuations currently affecting the Laser Interferometer Gravitational-wave Observatory (<a href="https://www.ligo.caltech.edu/" target="_blank">LIGO</a>), which detects gravity waves. If the researchers were able to take information from one system and apply it in another, they could get more precise readings. </p>
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<p>While the new technology is promising, research into creating useable devices based on quantum mechanics is very challenging, as explained by Ph.D. student Christoffer Østfeldt:</p><p>"Imagine the different ways of realizing quantum states as a kind of zoo of different realities or situations with very different qualities and potentials," he shared.</p><p>If one was to try to make a device using quantum states that would all have different functions, "it will be necessary to invent a language they are all able to speak. The quantum states need to be able to communicate, for us to use the full potential of the device. That's what this entanglement between two elements in the zoo has shown we are now capable of," Østfeldt added.</p>
<p>Check out the new study in <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1038/s41567-020-1031-5" target="_blank">Nature Physics</a>.<br></p>
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Diplomats sign letter supporting gay rights in Poland
Poland has become an increasingly unwelcoming place for the LGBT community. 50 diplomats hope to change that.
September 30, 2020
Sentemon/Shutterstock
Politics & Current Affairs
- An open letter, signed by 50 ambassadors and NGO leaders, asked the Polish government to respect LGBT rights.
- The Polish Government responded by denying the implied discrimination exists.
- Poland has been deemed the "worst place to be gay" in the EU in spite of this.
<p> Of all the countries in Europe to have a right-wing, authoritarian turn over the last few years, one would have thought that Poland was one of the least likely candidates.</p><p>After enduring a brutal invasion by Nazi Germany, suffering under the military regime imposed on them, and seeing millions of their countrymen die, they then experienced fifty years of soviet-style dictatorship, which ended only with the revolutions of 1989. Few nations have endured so much in living memory. </p><p>Despite these hard-won lessons, Poland has taken a turn towards authoritarianism over the last few <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/22/world/europe/poland-hungary-coronavirus.html" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">years</a>. As with all such turns, an enemy is designated as the implausible source of potential national decline and a threat to a decent way of life. In this case, it is LGBT+ individuals. </p><p>The stigmatization of LGBT+ individuals in Poland has been increasingly vicious, with several provinces, covering nearly a third of the country, having declared themselves "<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT-free_zone" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">LGBT Free Zones</a>." While of dubious legality and mostly unenforceable, the declarations seek to limit things such as pride parades by declaring the polity in opposition to "LGBT ideology." Despite these declarations' limited legal ramifications, life for LGBT people in these zones can be <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-54191344" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">unpleasant</a>. <br> <br> In response to this, more than 50 signatories, consisting primarily of ambassadors to Poland, have endorsed an open letter speaking to the need for all people to be able to enjoy their rights and the duties of governments to protect them. </p>
p { margin-bottom: 0.1in; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; orphans: 2; widows: 2; background: transparent } a:visited { color: #800000; text-decoration: underline } a.western:visited { so-language: zxx } a:link { color: #000080; text-decoration: underline } a.western:link { so-language: zxx } Strongly worded letters, the weapon of champions.
<p> Organized by the Embassy of the Kingdom of Belgium in Poland, the <a href="https://pl.usembassy.gov/open_letter/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">open</a> <a href="https://pl.usembassy.gov/open_letter/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">letter</a> was signed by the Ambassadors of 43 nations, representing most of Europe, all of continental North America, as well as several countries from Asia, Africa, and South America. Representatives of various international organizations, including the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, also signed. </p><p>The letter pays tribute to those working for LGBT+ rights in Poland and affirms the dignity found in each person "as expressed in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights." It goes on to remind the reader that "Respect for these fundamental rights... obliges governments to protect all citizens from violence and discrimination and to ensure they enjoy equal opportunities."</p><p>It ends with the declaration, "Human rights are universal and everyone, including LGBT+ persons, are entitled to their full enjoyment. This is something that everyone should support."</p><p>The American Ambassador to Poland, Georgette Mosbacher, <a href="https://twitter.com/USAmbPoland/status/1310276250993405954?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1310276250993405954%7Ctwgr%5Eshare_3&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.them.us%2Fstory%2F50-countries-sign-letter-condemning-polands-lgbt-free-zones" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">retweeted</a> the letter and added, "Human Rights are not an ideology - they are universal. 50 Ambassadors and Representatives agree." </p>The Response of the Polish Government
<iframe width="730" height="430" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/EBthKt2Of9U" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe><p> As you might expect, the Polish Government was less than pleased with the letter and its implications. <br> <br> The Prime Minister of Poland, Mateusz Morawiecki, rejected the letter and its implications by saying "Nobody needs to teach us tolerance, because we are a nation that has learned such tolerance for centuries and we have given many testimonies to the history of such tolerance."<strong></strong></p><p><strong> </strong>This sort of rebuttal is nothing new; just last week, when American Presidential Candidate Joe Biden tweeted that "LGBT-free zones' have no place in the European Union or anywhere in the world," the <a href="https://wyborcza.pl/7,173236,26327279,polish-embassy-to-biden-no-lgbt-free-zones-exist-in-poland.html?disableRedirects=true" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Polish Embassy in the United States </a>was quick to say the tweet was based on inaccurate information, to reassure the world that there are no such zones, and to restate their belief there is no place for discrimination in society. <br> </p><p>A quick fact check will demonstrate that they are lying. Several places in Poland have declared themselves to be "<a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-54191344" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">LGBT free zones,</a>" violence inspired by anti-LGBT+ propaganda has taken <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/27/world/europe/gay-pride-march-poland-violence.html?action=click&module=RelatedLinks&pgtype=Article" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">place</a>, l<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/30/world/europe/LGBT-free-poland-EU-funds.html" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">eading government figures</a> have declared homosexuality to be a "threat to Polish identity, to our nation, to its existence and thus to the Polish state," the President of Poland, Andrzej Duda has declared the LGBT movement to be more dangerous than <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-54317902" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Communism</a><a href="https://theconversation.com/how-a-gender-conspiracy-theory-is-spreading-across-the-world-133854" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">. Surveys</a> show nearly a third of Poland's people believe in a grand conspiracy against them involving "<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-gender_movement" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">gender ideology.</a>"</p><p>It is also worth repeating that Poland has been declared the worst place in the European Union for <a href="https://notesfrompoland.com/2020/05/14/poland-ranked-as-worst-country-in-eu-for-lgbt-people/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">gay</a><a href="https://notesfrompoland.com/2020/05/14/poland-ranked-as-worst-country-in-eu-for-lgbt-people/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">rights</a>. Same-sex unions of any kind, including civil unions, are still illegal, and gay couples have no right to adopt children. Laws against hate crimes and conversion therapy are also notoriously lacking. Though to their credit, gay men and bisexuals can donate blood in Poland with greater ease then they can in the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_donation_restrictions_on_men_who_have_sex_with_men#Europe" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">United States. </a> </p><p>Despite having a first-hand understanding of the dangers of authoritarianism and intolerance than most nations, some in Poland continue to use the LGBT+ community as a boogeyman. While it is not the first time such things have been done, perhaps it will be one of the last. </p>
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