I am a story I have put together based on my subjective take on the world. This subjectivity is a function of my inherited conditioning and the conditioning I receive from my environment. Both are somewhat random and unique. But the story is nothing more than a draft. It is constantly under revision depending on further conditioning. There is a self-destined aspect to this because my current conditioning affects all past and future conditioning. In other words the way I experience the present dictates the way I now experience the past and the way I experienced the past dictates how I experience the present. Thus the future is in some way ushered in. The word Karma is sometimes used to describe or at least understand this process. But its hard to believe this story because there seems to be a deeper awareness which observes this story-telling with some detachment, without judgment. Its a more ultimate self a deeper register that stands outside the story. Its like a shadow...it moves when I turn. It's always just out of the corner of my eye and if I try and look directly it hides. It's always there. It constantly reads in silence but sometimes the silence speaks...and that silence I realise is my own voice....and that I am the silent reader, not the story.