Re: Suppressing our sexual desires…good or bad?
Hi, Interesting topic! :) I would like to propose that suppression as it is being taught in the modern society is harmful: they cause psychological suffering and at least some of the reasons behind the teaching have no valid reason at all. Sex in itself is natural and thus ok - there could hardly be any argument about that. People (just like any other animal) will not be having sex all the time if there were no rules against it. We would still need to feed, find shelter, etc. We do have sex like animals (there is no other way), though some of us wish we had more than what we are getting.On the other hand, suppressed desires will demonstrate themselves if the suppression is not airtight. And it is exceptionally hard to achieve that. So I think that this suppression is the cause of suffering only. I also think that the suppression is not the aim of the whole abstinence issue. The moral values of not having premarital sex come from times when contraception and paternity tests were not available. The only certain way of making sure that one particular man fathered a child was to make sure that the women had sex only with that one particular man. The benefit is a certainty of the father whether he is raising his own child or an other man's. I would argue that this practical consideration was twisted into abstinence being a "virtue": to allow easier enforcement of the required abstinence. I think the explicit prohibition of adultery and the harsh sentence support this claim.The advances in contraception and dna testing make both the practice and the "virtue" of abstinence obsolete.In the modern society the purpose of abstinence can be achieved with means that don't cause any need for the suppression of natural desires. Further, the problem is not having sexual desires - the issue is how we act upon our sexual impulses. It seems to me that if taught to look at such desires as natural, taught what they are about, than we will tend to find a way that is acceptable both to the individual and the society. Linking sex with guilt, portraying it as dirty creates a huge conflict in one's mind when having to consider oneself guilty, dirty and despicable for experiencing a natural impulse. I think both are harmful.Teaching that sexuality is natural and ok is harmful to certain ancient doctrines that would like to keep their hold on society. I'm all for this harm... :PTeaching that sex should be suppressed harms actual people. This is immoral and lacks sufficient reasons.